Leela:
Hemadpant (the author) describes a witty incident in which Baba played the part of a peace-maker. There was a devotee by name Damodar Ghanashyam Babare alias Anna Chinchanikar. He had a fierce temper and spoke bluntly, without regard to the feelings of others. Though he looked outwardly harsh and uncompromising, he was honest, good natured, guileless and had great affection for Baba. Baba loved him in turn.
One time, Anna was standing on one side of Baba, massaging His left arm, which rested on the kathada (railing). On the other side, was Venubai Kaujalgi, an old widow who Baba referred to as mother and all others referred to as Mavashibai (maternal aunt), and who was an elderly woman of pure heart, single-mindedly devoted to Baba.
Mavashibai was massaging Baba's abdomen so vigorously that her face was moving up and down with her strokes. In doing so once, she swung too far to one side, and it so happened that her face came very close to Anna's. Being of a witty disposition she teased, "Oh, this Anna is a wayward fellow. He wants to kiss me. Even being so old with grey hair he feels no shame in kissing me." These words enraged Anna and he pulled up his sleeves and said, "You say that I am an old man of bad character. Am I a fool? It is you who has picked a quarrel with me".
The devotees present were highly entertained by this encounter between them. Baba, who loved both devotees equally, managed the situation skillfully. He said very affectionately, "Oh Anna, why this unnecessary uproar? I do not understand what is improper about kissing the mother?" Upon hearing these words, the two devotees were satisfied and the rest laughed merrily in appreciation of Baba's wit.
Based on Shri Sai Satcharita, The wonderful life and teachings of Shri Sai Baba, Translated by Nagesh Vasudev Gunaji (Mumbai: Shri Sai Baba Sansthan, Shirdi, 20th Edition 2002), p128
Based on Shri Sai Satcharita, The Life and Teachings of Shirdi Sai Baba, G. R. Dhalbokar, Translated by Indira Kher (Slovenia: Bird Publisher, 2009), p206-207
Teachings from Leela:
Mavashibai was playfully teasing Anna. Instead of responding with humour of his own, being of stern nature, he took offence and reacted with anger. In this leela, Baba taught Anna (and the rest of us) one way to deal with this type of anger. Implied in this teaching is that anger is not good for you. So, the question is, why is anger bad?
In our tradition, there are 5 main obstacles to spiritual development:
1. Kama (sensory pleasure)
2. Krodha (anger)
3. Moha (attachment to people)
4. Lobha (greed for material things)
5. Ahamkara (ego)
Let’s look at Krodha (anger) in more detail. Anger is almost always triggered due to one of the following reasons:
a. People or worldly objects to which you have strong attachment are threatened or attacked.
b. Your Ahamkara (ego) is threatened or attacked.
Some of the most basic advice in our tradition offers is that, in order to make spiritual progress, you must free yourself of (1) your attachments, and (2) your ego.
The Bhagavad Gita says:
But one who controls the mind, and is free from attachment and aversion, even while using the objects of the senses, attains the Grace of God (note 1).
Anger is a particularly dangerous obstacle in your spiritual journey as it has the potential to completely derail you from it. When you get angry, you act unwisely, either with harsh words or with violence, generating bad karma as you do so. Usually the target of your anger reciprocates, also with violence or harsh words, making you even more angry. You react to this anger, acting unwisely yet again. Each time you do so, you accumulate more bad karma, and drift further away from your spiritual goals. You are caught in a vicious circle and may not be able to escape it for a long time.
Baba is offering you a technique here to completely avoid this trap. Pay close attention to it and apply it to your everyday life.
2) If you can intervene to diffuse a potential conflict you must
If there is tension growing between two people in front of you, and you realise that it is likely going to break out into open conflict, you must intervene. Via this leela, Baba is teaching us that we must not remain as bystanders, simply enjoying the ‘entertainment’ at others’ expense.
Putting into Practice
Here are some suggestions on how we could use this leela in our daily lives.
1) When you catch yourself being provoked into anger, quickly deflect this anger by putting the provocation into a new perspective so that it no longer offends you
The actions we do out of anger have long term consequences, as explained beautifully in the following story:
Once upon a time there was a little boy who was talented, creative, handsome, and extremely bright. A natural leader. The kind of person everyone would normally have wanted on their team or project. But he was also self-centered and had a very bad temper. When he got angry, he usually said, and often did, some very hurtful things. In fact, he seemed to have little regard for those around him. Even friends. So, naturally, he had few. “But,” he told himself, “that just shows how stupid most people are!”
As he grew, his parents became concerned about this personality flaw, and pondered long and hard about what they should do. Finally, the father had an idea. And he struck a bargain with his son. He gave him a bag of nails, and a BIG hammer. “Whenever you lose your temper,” he told the boy, “I want you to really let it out. Just take a nail and drive it into the oak boards of that old fence out back. Hit that nail as hard as you can!”
Of course, those weathered oak boards in that old fence were almost as tough as iron, and the hammer was mighty heavy, so it wasn’t nearly as easy as it first sounded. Nevertheless, by the end of the first day, the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence (That was one angry young man!). Gradually, over a period of weeks, the number dwindled down. Holding his temper proved to be easier than driving nails into the fence! Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He felt mighty proud as he told his parents about that accomplishment.
“As a sign of your success,” his father responded, “you get to PULL OUT one nail. In fact, you can do that each day that you don’t lose your temper even once.”
Well, many weeks passed. Finally, one day the young boy was able to report proudly that all the nails were gone.
At that point, the father asked his son to walk out back with him and take one more good look at the fence. “You have done well, my son,” he said. “But I want you to notice the holes that are left. No matter what happens from now on, this fence will never be the same. Saying or doing hurtful things in anger produces the same kind of result. There will always be a scar. It won’t matter how many times you say you’re sorry, or how many years pass, the scar will still be there. And a verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. People are much more valuable than an old fence. They make us smile. They help us succeed. Some will even become friends who share our joys, and support us through bad times. And, if they trust us, they will also open their hearts to us. That means we need to treat everyone with love and respect. We need to prevent as many of those scars as we can.”
A most valuable lesson, don’t you think? And a reminder most of us need from time to time. Everyone gets angry occasionally. The real test is what we DO with it.
If we are wise, we will spend our time building bridges rather
than barriers in our relationships
(Note 2).
To diminish and eventually remove anger, you must work to loosen your bondage to worldly attachments and to diminish your ego.
Each path of spirituality helps you with these tasks. If you are new to the path, the Karma Marg (Path of Selfless Service) is the best place to start. As you perform selfless service, you get more and more comfortable with the idea that not everything in this world is about you. As you serve others in need, you begin to realize that you have much more to give of yourself to people in addition to the ones you hold near and dear, eventually widening your affection to all living beings, and thus to God. As a result, you have a diminished ego, and your attachments to worldly objects decrease, and your attachment to God increases.
For times when you do lose control, use this leela as an example and think of the situation from a different perspective to diffuse your anger. Just as Baba suggested to Anna, that he see Mavashibai as his mother, so can you re-frame the situation provoking your anger to one more acceptable.
2) If you can intervene to diffuse a potential conflict you must
In a situation where you could intervene and help avoid a conflict from breaking out between two people, do not just stand by and enjoy the entertainment at their expense. You must try to diffuse the situation to the best of your ability. In some situations, persuasion is needed, while in another situation, humor could be used, as was used by Baba in this leela.
The benefit of humor is that it deflects tension and helps resolve conflicts by letting both parties involved see the situation from a different perspective, and allows them to climb down from their anger without losing face.
For the parties involved in conflict, this strategy may be hard to remember and apply in the heat of the moment. You, on the other hand, being a bystander could remember this leela, and use humor as a solution.
Use humor, not humiliation. Using humor does not mean making fun of either party involved, or belittling them. This could take away any opportunity for face-saving and make the situation worse. Handle the situation wisely.
Mantra:
Om, Sarve bhavantu sukhinaḥ
Sarve santu nirāmayāḥ
Sarve bhadrāṇi paśyantu
Mā kashchit duḥkha bhāgbhavet
Oṁ Shāntiḥ, Shāntiḥ, Shāntiḥ
Meaning:
May all be prosperous and happy
May all be free from illness
May all see what is spiritually uplifting
May no one suffer
Om peace, peace, peace
This above mantra is from the Brihadaaranyaka Upanishad
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/seekingshanti/2015/09/hinduprayerforeveryone_globalgoals/
I would encourage all of you to please share your interpretations, learnings and experiences on how you have put this leela into practice.
Om Sai Ram.
Notes:
1) http://www.holy-bhagavad-gita.org/chapter/2/verse/64
2) https://leadingpersonality.wordpress.com/2013/05/17/anger-management-nails-in-the-fence-story/
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